Hope for Parents of Troubled Teens by Rae

Author:Rae
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: REL012030, FAM043000, Parenting—Religious aspects—Christianity, Parenting, Parent and teenager
Publisher: Baker Publishing Group

Joining the Herd

It’s important that our young people have outlets for developing their social growth. In early adolescence, group activities are healthy opportunities to begin that tentative approach toward the opposite sex. If too many restrictions are put on these activities and we don’t offer other enjoyable options to them, social growth may be hampered or one-on-one boy-girl relationships may be fostered too soon, before an adolescent knows how to handle such relationships.

When parents either overprotect or pamper a child, it can lead to a desire in the child to be noticed, even if negatively. If the parent insists on controlling his child’s social life, the child may become dependent on his parents for his social satisfaction and have great difficulty relating to others his own age in their sphere of activities.

Sometimes delinquent or undesirable behavior develops because our teens have outgrown childish games, but no new and acceptable alternatives have taken their place. They don’t have enough to do. Restless adolescents want to be with kids their own age, doing almost anything. Being part of whatever activities are going on is one way of finding social acceptance.

Psychologist to adolescents, J. Church, refers to the group life of adolescents as “herd-life.” The herd gets together at the local hangout for food, drinks, and small talk. The herd goes joyriding in the car, to a movie, to a dance, or to hear a band play. They meet at the mall just to walk around or to sit and watch. To be part of the teen social scene, a kid has to join the herd and be with them. For the rebellious youth, the herd may assemble at whatever home or apartment is available on a Friday or Saturday night for alcohol, drugs, and sex. But sometimes your child just wants to be somewhere with someone who thinks like he does.

Kids need something to do. If parents deny them the activities most of their friends are involved in, they may rebel and do those things anyway—unless they have something else that interests them.

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